Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
