we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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