We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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