just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
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