Dual....:-)
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
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While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
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Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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