in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Randomize
