I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
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