The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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