yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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