but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
