oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
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just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
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Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
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