I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
