well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
