New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
