I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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