I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Randomize
