The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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