i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
