I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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