He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
