You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
