How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
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