y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
