Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize
