NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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