So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
