I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize