Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Randomize
