after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
