Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
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