Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
