38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
