I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
