hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
