that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Randomize
