I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
