things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
farters have to be the big spoon...
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
