im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
