i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
