Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Randomize
