Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
