It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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