you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
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