Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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