Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
