What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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