What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Randomize