She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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