i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
