Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
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